In writing the battle, I departed from today's choreography for screenplays. Often you see the hero/heroine take increasingly drastic measures until s/he descends to the enemy's level. I couldn't do that with Barak. Why? Barak already won the battle the night before. It is so settled in his mind that he will even forego revenge in order to fulfill God's will.
Meanwhile, Deborah will have her own battle. She will have to ditch the fear that has haunted her whole life in order to save Bennoam.
Some may notice that Barak's speech to the men comes out of Moses' instructions for war. Sure, we all loved Aragorn's speech to the men of Gondor and Rohan in Return of the King, but you simply can't top this speech.
EXT. FIELD IN WILDERNESS - VERY EARLY MORNING
The sun, blood red, rises over a sleepy Canaanite camp. Two Canaanite SCOUTS whisper.
SCOUT 1: Hey, check out the sunrise. What’s that saying? Red sun in the morning?
SCOUT 2: We’re still in the dry season. It won’t rain for two more months.
SCOUT 1: Still, I don’t like it.
EXT. KISHON RIVER - MORNING
Hordes of Canaanite SOLDIERS gather at the Kishon River. In orderly fashion, SISERA and his CHARIOTEERS bring their horses to the Kishon to drink, then align their chariots with thousands of Soldiers forming columns behind them.
Sisera moves his chariot into the lead.
EXT. WOODS ON TABOR - CONTINUOUS
Fully risen, the sun is now pale yellow. Wind RUSTLES in the trees. White wisps of clouds unite into thicker, darker columns.
Deborah walks among kneeling Israelite SOLDIERS. She touches each on the head in blessing and prayer.
Barak climbs into a chariot. All the Israelites stand and focus on him.
BARAK: When you go out to battle today and see horses and chariots and a people more than you, be not afraid of them: for the LORD thy God is with you, the same God who brought us out of the land of Egypt.
Hear, O Israel, we approach this day to battle our enemies: let not your hearts faint, fear not, and do not tremble, neither be terrified because of them; for the LORD your God is he that goes with you, to fight for you against your enemies, to save you!
Barak gestures to encompass the sky and the land before them.
BARAK: It is He who will fight for us!
The Israelite Soldiers CHEER.
Deborah joins Barak on the chariot. She speaks to him and the Men.
DEBORAH: Up, for this is the day in which the LORD hath delivered Sisera into thine hand: is not the LORD gone out before thee?
Barak CALLS OUT, shofars SOUND, the Israelite Soldiers rush downward.
The two ARMIES plunge into battle.
I/E. A CAVE NEAR TABOR - CONTINUOUS
Deborah climbs up the hill to the mouth of the cave.
DEBORAH: All right, Ben, you can come out.
Bennoam emerges.
BENNOAM: Thank you. I was getting tired of hiding.
DEBORAH: You, Ben? Tired of hiding?
BENNOAM: Yeah. May I watch the battle with you?
DEBORAH: Only if you will pray with me.
BENNOAM: Yes, ma’am. Thank you.
He takes her hand and walks with her. They sit on a rock that looks down toward the Kishon and the plain of Jezreel. From there, the war below seems blurred and imaginary.
Time passes.
BENNOAM: Will Barak be okay?
DEBORAH: Ben, I want you to finish up your chores in the cave. Let’s have it nice for Barak and the others when they get back.
BENNOAM: All right. Will you come in with me?
DEBORAH: In a little while.
BENNOAM: You don’t like caves, do you?
DEBORAH: No. But I will get over it.
BENNOAM: Okay. I will see you in there.
Bennoam goes into the cave. Whistling, he takes a tool and
pitches hay.
Time passes.
BENNOAM: (to himself) Well, at least this isn’t kitchen duty. How’d they fit all those horses in here?
Bennoam balances the pitchfork against his leg and picks at a blister.
Deep inside the cave, there is a low RUMBLE and CRACKING sound.
Bennoam puts down the pitchfork.
No one to the left.
No one to the right.
BENNOAM: Hey!
His voice ECHOES briefly.
He takes a torch and heads deeper into the cave.
BENNOAM: Hey! Echo! Echo!
Bennoam’s shadow dances on the wall, disappears.
EXT. A CAVE NEAR TABOR - CONTINUOUS
With Bennoam out of sight, Deborah hugs herself and rubs her eyes to keep the tears from coming.
DEBORAH: (to herself) Have faith, Deborah. Breathe.
She forces herself to watch the battle.
DEBORAH: Sovereign LORD, please let Your word be true, Your promises sure. Lead Barak and Lapidoth to victory. Amen.
The ground RUMBLES under Deborah. She jumps to her feet, runs into the cave alone.
DEBORAH: Ben!
EXT. MONTAGE - CONTINUOUS
1. The wilderness in Edom: the bell on a goat’s neck JINGLES. Other goats look up. Rocks slide and crash.
2. THUNDER. Rain dots parched soil.
3. Mount Sinai: smoke and an avalanche. Shepherds look up and run.
4. The Plain of Jezreel: the battle rages. Swords pound shields. Hermes clutches at an arrow piercing his chest. He falls.
5. The wilderness in Ephraim: Lapidoth leads MEN, ambushes Jabin’s Men.
7. Rain and hail cut sideways into the faces of Canaanite Soldiers.
8. Barak drives a chariot, briefly turns his face into the rain. Beside him his archer SETH shoots, pierces Canaanite Soldiers.
9. Torrents of rain on Soldiers in ankle deep mud. Feet step over muddied bodies.
10. North of Tabor: a dry riverbed fills with crashing white water.
INT. A CAVE NEAR TABOR - CONTINUOUS
Deborah raises a torch.
DEBORAH: Ben?
DEBORAH: Ben?
No one to the left.
No one to the right.
Deborah kicks through the hay. She raises the torch, lowers it. Shadows lengthen and shorten.
DEBORAH: Ben? Where are you? I – I have another chore for you.
The ground jerks. Deborah cracks her head against a stalactite. She rubs her head. Blood dots her fingertips.
She steadies the torch.
A bit of straw lies before a narrow tunnel.
DEBORAH: Ben!
EXT. PLAIN OF JEZREEL - CONTINUOUS
The earth shakes. Horses rear and NEIGH. Men fall from horses and chariots. White foam gives way to roiling brown waters, knocking the legs out from under Canaanite FOOTMEN.
The Kishon River surges and widens. Bodies wash downstream.
A wave knocks out a team of Canaanite horses. Their CHARIOTEER fights to free his horses. The flood pulls him under.
A flaming meteorite tears across the sky. Another and another ROAR through the air and CRASH into the Canaanite army. Hundreds collapse at the concussion.
Sisera’s group is cut off from the main army. He YELLS orders. None respond. He YELLS orders again. The Soldiers regroup.
A TROOP of Zebulun corners Sisera.
Sisera jumps out of his chariot and flees.
Sisera jumps out of his chariot and flees.
Barak’s archer SETH points.
SETH: Barak, look! It’s Sisera!
BARAK: Where?
Seth puts an arrow to his bow.
SETH: Drive closer, Barak! I can reach him. The man who killed your father will be ours!
Barak quickly analyzes.
BARAK: No, we are needed here. Sisera has killed many fathers beside my own. The chariots must be our focus!
Seth shoots at Canaanite Charioteers but keeps looking toward Sisera.
SETH: But he’s getting away! The coward can be ours!
BARAK: It is not your call, Seth! We drive on!
Barak drives his chariot ahead, nearly avoiding an enemy chariot. A CANAANITE lunges and grabs Seth. Barak draws his sword and slashes to free him.
Seth collapses to his knees.
CANAANITES close in on Barak. They surround and mount Barak’s horses. Barak fights, throws one to the ground, stabs another.
Seth pulls himself up with bleeding hands. He has no more arrows. He draws his sword, lashes out.
Barak’s chariot jerks wildly as several Canaanites overturn it.
INT. A CAVE NEAR TABOR - CONTINUOUS
Deborah, bleeding and dirty, squeezes through the tunnel.
DEBORAH: Ben! Where are you?
BENNOAM (O.S.): (weakly) Judge Deborah?
DEBORAH: Ben! I’m coming!
BENNOAM (O.S.): I’m sorry, Deborah. I didn’t mean to wander. I heard this noise.
DEBORAH: Stay where you are! I’m coming!
On the other side of the wall, rocks block most of Bennoam from view. He lies under rubble. He still holds his torch.
BENNOAM: Deborah, I’m scared. I can’t move.
DEBORAH (O.S.): I’m coming, Ben. Can you do me a favor?
BENNOAM: If I can, ma’am.
DEBORAH (O.S.): Can you sing to me?
BENNOAM: What do I sing?
DEBORAH: Make up a song for me. Please? I need you to sing to me.
BENNOAM: What do I sing?
DEBORAH: Make up a song for me. Please? I need you to sing to me.
Bennoam wipes tears and dirt from his face.
BENNOAM: Okay.
I had a little donkey, but Barak had to go. He said he’d get a horse for me, but now I just don’t know.
Deborah licks sweat off her lip. She inches forward on her hands and knees.
DEBORAH: That’s good, Ben! I’m almost there!
The earth shakes violently. Deborah drops the torch. It sputters out. Darkness.
Deborah slows her breathing, whispers to herself.
DEBORAH: LORD God, help us. Please. I can't do this without You.
A shadow on a rock shifts from a flickering light source.
DEBORAH: Ben, is that your torch? Can you hold it high?
BENNOAM (O.S.): Yes. How's this?
DEBORAH: Good. Thank you, Ben. You are really helping me.
The ground surges sideways.
BENNOAM (O.S.): Deborah! Help me! Water’s coming in!
No comments:
Post a Comment